SALT LAKE CITY (KUTV) Let's just get straight to it: marriage can be hard work.
The honeymoon period eventually ends, and then what do you do to keep the magic going?
Emil Harker, a marriage therapist, says he knows the secret to how to make your honeymoon last your entire marriage.
“One of things things I hated hearing when I was engaged and newly married was that I should enjoy the honeymoon stage because it's not going to last. What kind of crappy advice is that?! Seriously!!!” Emil says. “Now as a marriage therapist with almost 20 years of experience I've created a simple way to make the honeymoon last forever!”
Why the honeymoon ends?
"Limerence" the intoxicating feeling of being in love. When you first "fall in love" this is the feeling that actually compels you to do all the loving sweet things and keep the "You can do not wrong" attitude. Although this is only a stage we can use limerence as a springboard into tried and true principles and strategies to help this love grow deeper and stronger than limerence can provide.
What you can do to make the honeymoon last forever:
- Create a list of your own personal 10 marriage affirmations and read them out loud together before going to bed. (You can always add to the list or change them if you want) For example:
- I will share my thoughts, feelings and preferences and disappointments in a kind and sensitive manner.
- Before I get upset, I will try to understand my partner’s perspective.
- I will seek to understand and exceed my partner’s sexual expectations.
- When my spouse is upset, frustrated, disappointed, I will seek to show that I understand before getting defensive.
- I seek feedback on how to better meet my partners needs at least once a week.
- Use the "Check-In" Worksheet: 4 questions that will get you on track and keep you on track.
- Learn and practice good communication principles to handle disappointments and share preferences in a clear direct and sensitive manner.
To help you with these, Emil has created an online program called EmilsMarriageClub.com that give you full access to the entire program with a free month. Just use the discount coupon code "KUTV" and get your first month free!