The Marriage Mindset from a marriage and sex therapist

Emil Harker

Make this Valentine's Day last forever with the marriage mindset. Marriage and sex therapist, Emil Harker joins Fresh Living to share this mindset.

He says to think about times in your life when you have been the happiest. Among all of the variables, one element stands out as the most significant contributor. The quality of life and overall satisfaction and fulfillment of life are intertwined with the quality of marriage.

What contributes to the quality of marriage. Throughout this coming year of 2020, I’ll be sharing some of the most important tips that I’ve learned over the past 20 years as a marriage and sex therapist. The first and most important is the marriage mindset.

The biggest difference in determining the quality of the marriage actually has more to do with who you choose to be than who you choose to be with.

When asked about a good marriage mindset, Emil says the idea about unconditional love is a huge problem. It sounds great but it’s practically a guarantee for a marriage to fail. If two people want to be accepted the way they are, then both want the other person to meet their needs without anyone wanting to make changes.

Emil gives advice to first, to have a dreamy marriage be your spouse's dream partner. The more you focus your energy on developing the character and attributes that really mean a lot to your partner, the more loved and secure your partner will be to explore what they can do to grow in ways that help you feel more loved. Ask yourself what you can do to better meet your spouse's love needs. If you get stuck, ask your spouse!

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